You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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