Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
