He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Randomize
