Plan B is the new Plan A
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
