Ambien. No doubt about it.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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