Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
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