I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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