kristin has been a bad kristin
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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