Duck Duck Cougar?
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Randomize
