just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize