lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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