It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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