what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
how does that bad decision feel?
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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