Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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