Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
