It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
