even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
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