i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize