Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
