franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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