but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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