Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
