very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
handjob tips. give me some.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize