New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
