the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
