Will you blow on my dice?
The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize
