Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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