He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
