ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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