i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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