i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
