The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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