i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Gay?
German.
Pity.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Randomize
