Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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