dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
