it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize
