she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize