have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize