jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize
