You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize
