What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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