READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize