lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
