This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Randomize
