I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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