Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
