I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
