nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
