I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Randomize