Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
